Brummie bus bows out at last!

Great news! The Birmingham-built Metrobus is being pensioned off, says the BBC. This boneshaker has been seen as a success story and no doubt it has done its job without breakdowns. Phil Bateman was head of the transport authority when the buses were ordered. He said, "They were Brummie buses built for people in the West Midlands to travel on and they suited our streets extremely well. They gave us efficiencies that we were craving at the time." But were they comfy back when they first appeared? I have to admit I don't know as I didn't do bus travel then. But I do now and my heart sinks when one of these turns up.

My guess is that we were never going to be treated to too much comfort as the seat slashers and cigarette smokers were competing for space. Even now the Birmingham buses are subject to blatant drug taking, window decoration and chewing gum impregnations. Seeing as there is no law enforcement to keep these types off buses and I'm looking forward to my bus pass, I'd like all bus companies to put up signs such as "This bus will stop automatically if a whiff of marijuana is detected, a window pane is defaced, or a seat is defiled!" Then I'd suggest all doors close and the perpetrators taken away by a police service that has been given the equivalent of sitting ducks at a rifle range.

On The Buses? No, off them if middle class!

The Local Government Association, which has commissioned a report (more work for consultants!) about bus passes, has come to the conclusion that posh, rich middle class people with cars should not be riding around in buses with free concessionary passes. No way matey! Get in your car, clog up the roads, you're costing us too much. Let some other blighters sort it all out. We're being short-changed by the government, they weep.

After a furore and a hullabaloo, the LGA denied that it was considering introducing means tests. So was this "commissioned report" just jobs for the boys, or was it an opening shot in some inter-governmental showdown? Either way, it's a warning sign to us all.

I would hope that the next general election produces MPs who are representatives of the people and not career politicians cravenly working the system to suit "government" and themselves. As they say, I must declare an interest. I'm in the bass pass queue next year. Unless of course they change the age criterion in which case I won't!

We are supinely good in Britain at listening to waffle and rubbish and just shrugging our shoulders. I'm beginning to get a bit revolutionary. I want the stocks brought back. I'd shove Harriet Harperson in for a day. A few rotten tomatoes in her boat race might bring about a change. The only thing the British Establishment understands, and it understands very little, is latent unrest about to boil over. I suggest we get off the back burner and turn the heat up a bit. They might just get it then.