Sir Fred Goodwin is not a banker or an adulterer

The finger of suspicion

So now we know. Previously Sir Fred Goodwin went to great lengths to try to convince us he was no longer a banker. Some feel he never was one. Now he has tried to convince the world he was not an adulterer or more accurately to stop us knowing he is an adulterer. The super injunction world is collapsing fast. I don't really care what Sir Fred gets up to in his private life. It's when it drifts into his public life. However, it would have been more gracious and courageous if he had admitted his wrongdoing and let the dust settle gracefully.

All he has done now is to confirm in the minds of the British public that the world of banking with his ilk in charge was a generally nasty, corrupt and self-serving industry. Banking has gradually lost its soul over the years. It is now more a heartless, avaricious industry rather than a caring, informative and constructive one.

Lord Stoneham has done us all a favour by revealing this nonsense of secrecy. It is in the public interest if those at the centre of a failing bank, one that would have been forcibly folded if the taxpayer had not coughed up blood to support it, are involved in personal relationships that may compromise corporate governance.

Highway Robbery in the Square Mile!!

Stephen Hester appears to be a victim in this banking bonanza of bonus baggers. He is powerless to suppress the rampant greed of bank workers who are basically gamblers. He says if he doesn't shell out billions to these legalised punters, then they will go elsewhere. Is this man in the real world or living in a parrellel universe? If it wasn't so desperately wrong I'd think he'd got himself a part in a Carry On film.

The British public were told that the banks could not be allowed to fold. So shedloads of cash were poured into the likes of RBS. Hester has the brass neck to preside over a whopping loss of £3.6bn and still whine on about these blackmailing bonus buggers. It is outrageous.

Is the British public going to stand for this highway robbery? Hester told BBC Radio 4's Today programme, "We've had a small experiment in this respect... some of our best-performing people have been leaving in their thousands. The people who left us last year, I believe, would have increased our profits by up to £1bn beyond the ones that we've got." Really?

Where have these guys gone? Which bank is utilising their skills? Some offshore operation? A Swiss bank? Thousands have left have they? 40,000, maybe? Or 3/4,000? It's all so vague. No concrete figures are ever given. Just the parrot call telling us that whopping bonuses are an absolute must in 21st century banking. And can we be sure that any of the money used in this casino is real in any sense? I get the sense it's just another version of the wonderful sub-prime money laundering excercise that got us into this mess in the first place.

A man in Scotland made 21% on his investments last year and emailed the BBC to suggest anyone could do it, simply because the markets had risen strongly. Simon Hester was pushed three times on this (not exactly firmly) and gave a limp-wristed response. The truth is nearer the fact that RBS is being held to ransom by those who have found a great way to exploit banks to fuel their insatiable greed.

UNBELIEVABLE!!!!

Brussels sprouts up to threaten to close banks down!

So the British government isn't really in charge. I knew that and most voters knew it last month. The eurocrats are in charge. Gordon Brown is the pudding stirrer but it is these wonders from the Wallonian wilderness who get to choose the ingredients. Sometimes it's all nice stuff, very tasty and tempting but likely to lead to overbloating. Sometimes, it's just a stick with no carrots!

They've allowed us to rescue the banks. Well, a lifeline more. If it isn't sorted in five years the lifeline gets cut. Philip Lowe, director general of the Commission's competition department, said that his officials were now looking at the long-term viability of Royal Bank of Scotland and Lloyds Banking Group and their ability to be weaned off state aid within five years. If they are unable to survive on their own, they will be closed down, as with other industrial sectors such as shipbuilding. "We will do that with the banking sector. We would impose a winding down if the viability of the bank isn't assured," said Mr Lowe.

So there you have it. De facto and de *****! Perhaps if Mr.Lowe is so keen to wind them down if they don't perform, he could start with the bonuses, which are still being squeezed out of the coffers like a wet blanket in the hands of a blancheseuse.

Wiping the smiles from their faces!

Four former bank executives are at this moment being grilled by the Treasury Select Committe. All have said sorry. As I left it, Lord Stevenson was sounding cheerful about future bonus structures. I got the impression they know it went wrong, that they felt it could go wrong, but, like a Las Vegas gambler, they wanted to have one more roll of the dice. Now they can't.

Andy Hornby sounded contrite. I'm not sure about the others. We may all have got wound up in the greedy credit spree and wanted bigger and better houses, bigger cars, and so on. But most of us didn't or couldn't bundle up loans to resell them like some frightful pyramid scheme.

A chap on BBC News suggested that, if this was the USA, these guys could be facing criminal charges for fraud. The trouble with fraud is proving it. Incompetence and a clouded brain are good defences in a court of law. That's why today is such a bind for them. Say they knew about everything and the book could be thrown at them. Come across as if they knew diddley-squat and they will for ever be seen as fools and Clarkson-type idiots!